I mean, is happiness a singular emotion? Like, you know, when you stub your pinky toe, it hurts. And what you feel is pain. Sharp, short, or longer and stabbing, it doesn’t much matter. It’s pain. Simple.
Is there something similar for happiness? Like stepping into the sunlight, and voila, happy? Or is happiness the accumulation of different emotions? Or is being happy a state of being? Like when you are tired? And if so, what does that entail? I mean, when I am tired, I have a nap, or go to bed at night, and sleep. So if having a nap resolves the ‘being tired problem,’ is there a similar simple action one can take to get into the state of being happy?
I generally have some difficulties understanding emotions, or identifying them, however you look at it. What I mean by that is not that I don’t understand emotions per se. I’m quite knowledgeable with regards to the theoretical concept and the underlying processes of emotions, and I am very good at identifying them with regards to other people, and what they are feeling or thinking, and, given enough information, understand why. But my own emotional state is, most of the time, a mystery to me. The best I can do, again, most of the time, is probably saying, “I am.” Something. Maybe even happy.
Emotions are, for me, just not quantifiable enough. Not logical enough. You can’t approach emotions with logic and an Excel sheet—you’ll go nuts, trust me, I tried.
And in a society where everybody constantly (it seems) and confidently proclaims how they feel, it is a bit frustrating not to be able to do that. It’s a bit like standing in a mist and being asked to grab just one drop of water, whereas everybody else is standing in the sun with bottled water, being able to pour out whatever amount they need.
So, coming back to the whole happiness thing: when and how does one know if and when you are happy?
The American Psychological Association defines happiness as “an emotion of joy, gladness, satisfaction, and well-being.” And to be perfectly honest, that doesn’t get me one step closer to understanding what happiness means. Because for me, joy and gladness are just as abstract as the concept of happiness. Satisfaction is somewhat easier, although I have to say, my definition of satisfaction is entirely short-term and very situational-based. And don’t get me started on well-being.
We live in a society where it’s constantly pointed out that being happy is somewhat the ultimate goal. Of course, happiness and being happy have different meanings for different people. Just as what brings joy to one person doesn’t necessarily bring joy to another. But how can one pursue happiness if you just can’t grasp the concept?
Maybe it is easier to approach happiness from the other side, so to speak. To look at it in terms of absence— the absence of pain, or grief, or loss, or even hunger.
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